Walking Through Storms

“If you’re going through hell, keep going” – Winston Churchill

What are storms exactly? How do you know they are even happening in your life? Storms are what happens when your life is suddenly turned upside down and you don’t know what is happening or what you are supposed to do. It may be the sudden upheaval of your long-term relationship. Where all of a sudden you wake up one day and the person you thought loved you so much and you had a future with changes their mind, leaves and doesn’t care at all… As if you never mattered and you are just a short-lived memory. A life you thought you had ‘all figured out’ is destroyed in the matter of a moment with nowhere to turn and nothing to stand on. One moment you feel grounded and complete, the next, like a shattered piece of glass that won’t stop breaking and feels it will never come back together again. Storms can also be something like suddenly losing a job you loved, or having money and then all of a sudden you can’t pay your bills and your debts are piling up higher and higher. One moment you are on top of the world (or at least things feel somewhat stable) and the next, it seems you have lost everything.

Other storms are not about sudden loss but about too many problems and pain coming at you all at once. The overwhelm and bombardment of waves of pain that don’t seem to stop.

You know what I mean.

The times when not only your mother (or someone close to you) passed away, but your girlfriend or boyfriend left you, you lost your job, you can’t pay your rent, your car breaks down and you can’t pay your credit card bills.

How does someone handle everything coming at them all at once? How does someone manage?

It’s understandable if your first thought was get high or drunk. I mean why not? It blocks out as much as possible and in a moment, everything is switched back to better. It’s not that the problems are solved, but then there aren’t so many of them or they seem to go away as long as you stay ‘not sober’. Other people get addicted to other things such as work, diving into a new relationship, eating disorders…you name it…it’s been tried. Anything, absolutely anything to escape this awful reality, called life.
The problem is that pain and life difficulties are a bit like walking around with shoes versus barefoot. By the way, I’m not recommending anyone walk around barefoot on dirty streets here! But what I’m saying is that when you start walking barefoot at first it hurts because your feet aren’t used to it. However, after a while your feet get adjusted and are toughened up. Historically, in many tribal communities, people didn’t even wear shoes because their feet were so tough. Even walking on rocks didn’t hurt. The point is that using drugs and alcohol, or anything to numb you out and escape, makes you ultimately less able to handle things. Instead of helping you build up emotional strength, you may find you are struggling as much or more with challenges as when you started using and numbing out.

Everything rises and falls. Everything, absolutely everything, will come into your reality and then pass out of it, and then something new will arrive. This is the nature of reality. Although sometimes (and maybe often), it may seem like one damn thing after another is happening, but everything that is painful will eventually pass and something else will take its place. This is why community and support is so important. This is also why it’s necessary to learn tools to manage stress and life difficulties. Often, life is one problem after another, even from day to day. Therefore, why not learn how to get strong and tough in the face of the challenges?

You can do this. We don’t need to numb out to handle reality anymore.

Winston Churchill famously said “if you are going through hell, keep going.” This means keep walking, keep going forward… eventually hell will end and you will be in a brighter, better, new place. A different place.

With So So Much Love,
Sara <3

“When you come out of the storm, you won’t be the same person who walked in. That’s what this storm’s all about.” -Haruki Murakami

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